Growing up in Florida, you would think I always had a connection to the sea. But it wasn’t until I moved to the Costa Brava that I discovered how important it is to me. The first thing I wanted to do upon arriving in the coastal town where my husband’s parents lived, was to drive by the sea. It was December and contrary to popular belief, Spain does get cold. So, for the time being I had to content myself with driving by often until it was warm enough to put my toes in the sand.
It wasn’t much longer from my first day that it was sunny and much warmer, so we went to the sea. I remember sitting close to the shore, where the waves crashed just before me, barely touching my toes. I felt a strong sense of calm and the world seemed to shift at that moment. I knew that I was where I was supposed to be and that the universe had come together to bring me to this point in life. From that moment on, whenever life threw me a curveball I went to the sea to think it over. If I had a great day, I had an urge to go to the sea to celebrate. It was, in a strange way, my church. My place of prayer, thought and reflection.
After we moved inland, to Girona, the sea wasn’t as close though we would go to the beach almost every weekend so I got my fix then. I did manage to find a place in my new city that had a similar impact. It was the garden behind the Cathedral where we were married. It had winding paths, fountains and flowers and was so calm and peaceful. It was my own Garden of Eden. Yet, it evolved to me wondering how I could ever live somewhere without the sea or living far away from it. How could anyone? I pondered. And now, here I am living in the ‘Heart of America’, no sea in sight. I admit that when I’m feeling anxious and have things to think over, I haven’t quite found a place that calms me so. I really don’t think anything can replace the majesty of the sea anyway.
There are times when I go weeks or months without thinking about it and then it hits me, suddenly, that I am thousands of miles away from the place I spent so much time and how I feel a piece of myself is still sitting on the shore with the waves crashing before me, waiting for the rest of me to return. I suppose that is what homesickness is. It’s reassuring to know, that it will be there when I return. Ready to tell me its secrets and welcome me back.
Do you have a place like this? A place where you feel the most at ease? What do you do if you leave that special place? Below is a photo of me in Paradise. You understand why I miss it so?